Art as a Stubborn Journey to Empathy

  

Artworks from 'Atlas of Being ' series

 

Art as a Stubborn Journey to Empathy

Art is about being stubborn. It begins with the refusal to give in—to the pressures of conformity, the weight of doubt, or the noise of distractions. This stubbornness isn’t about arrogance; it’s about conviction. It’s about standing firm in the face of uncertainty, choosing to believe that something within you is worth exploring, worth bringing into existence, even if the world doesn’t immediately understand or value it.

But stubbornness isn’t without consequence. It thickens your skin. Rejections, misunderstandings, and failures become familiar companions, teaching you resilience. Over time, this "thickness" shields you from external judgment and self-doubt, allowing you to remain on the path, even when it feels like no one else sees what you see.

And yet, it’s in this space of stubborn persistence and thickened defenses that reflection begins. The solitude of creating—the repetition, the experimentation, the endless wrestling with ideas—forces you to look inward. You start to see yourself not just as the creator but as a human being in all your complexity: flawed, searching, vulnerable.

This self-reflection opens the door to empathy. As you navigate your own struggles, you recognize them in others. The stories you tell through your art become not just about you but about the shared experiences of humanity. Stubbornness, thick skin, and introspection evolve into compassion. You realize that art is not merely an act of self-expression; it’s a bridge to connect with others, to feel their joys, sorrows, and aspirations as if they were your own.

In the end, art is the process of being stubborn enough to create, thick enough to endure, and open enough to reflect. And in doing so, it transforms both the artist and the audience, fostering empathy in a world that so desperately needs it.

 

 

Art is...

 

 

My First Solo Exhibition: A Journey of Art and Self-Discovery

In 2004, just two years after relocating from Malaysia to Copenhagen, I embarked on a journey that would forever alter my artistic path—my first solo exhibition. This adventure was sparked by a serendipitous encounter in Jogjakarta with Pia Poulsen, a Danish anthropology student who would later become my life partner.

Encounter and Relocation

Meeting Pia in Jogjakarta felt like destiny. Our connection led to my relocation to Copenhagen, a city that soon became a haven for my art. Denmark, with its abundant resources, turned out to be the perfect backdrop for my creative endeavors.

Artistic Environment in Denmark

As an artist who thrives on repurposing discarded materials, Denmark was a paradise. The streets offered a treasure trove of resources, from old curtains to used papers, all waiting to be transformed into art. This practice of sustainable creativity, which I had begun in Malaysia, seamlessly continued in Copenhagen.

Artistic Process and Materials

My approach to art involves using what others discard. Old curtains became canvases, used papers served as my palette, and salvaged chairs and tables were reborn as sculptures. This method not only fosters creativity but also mirrors the trial-and-error process of a scientist, where each experiment, whether successful or not, contributes to the overall journey.

Exhibition Details

My first solo exhibition took place at Rødovre Bibliotek. The showcase featured a variety of artworks, including collages, acrylic paintings, and readymades. The audience's reception was overwhelmingly positive, with many appreciating the unique blend of materials and the thought-provoking themes.

Inspirations and Challenges

Inspiration came from the mundane aspects of daily life and deep personal reflections. However, the journey was not without its challenges. Balancing the creative process with the practicalities of preparing for the exhibition was a constant struggle.

Significant Moments and Support

One of the most memorable moments was the opening night. The support from fellow artists was heartwarming. Sound artist Dario Paini performed on his saxophone, and Danish beatnik poet Ole Lillelund read his poems, adding layers of depth to the experience.

Personal and Professional Impact

This exhibition marked a significant milestone in my life. It spurred personal growth and opened new professional avenues. The experience underscored the importance of perseverance and the value of community support in the artistic journey.

Conclusion

Reflecting on this journey, I am reminded of how our consumption habits shape our identities. Whether it's a new flat-screen TV, a luxurious Bugatti, or an electric bicycle, our choices reflect our values and societal norms. Through my art, I hope to prompt others to reflect on their own consumption patterns and the impact they have on our world.

Embarking on my first solo exhibition was not just about showcasing art; it was a journey of self-discovery and growth. It taught me that creativity thrives in the most unexpected places and that our choices, big or small, define who we are.

  

 

 

The Opening

 

 

A Journey Through My Inaugural Solo Exhibition in Malaysia

In 2007, I had the honor of presenting my inaugural solo exhibition at Pelita Hati, a renowned gallery in Kuala Lumpur. This milestone came four years after my relocation to Copenhagen, and it marked a significant chapter in my artistic journey.

Exhibition Highlights

The exhibition featured a diverse series of artworks, showcasing collages, monoprints on postcards, digital prints, drawings, and sculptures. Among these, the collage series stood out, crafted between 2006 and 2007 using posters from libraries and art magazines, particularly Art Forum. One piece, 'The Thinker,' garnered special recognition, being selected as the top choice by the editor in Saatchi Online Magazine's Weekly Top Ten in 2007.

Artistic Process

My artistic process is deeply intertwined with the mediums I use. From digital prints to sculptures, each piece is a culmination of various techniques and inspirations. The monoprint series, for instance, featured portraits of renowned and notorious figures from around the globe, sourced from Danish newspaper articles. This blend of traditional and modern techniques allows me to explore and express complex themes.

Public and Critical Reception

The exhibition received considerable media coverage, reflecting the public and critical interest in my work. This exposure not only validated my efforts but also connected me with a broader audience, eager to engage with my artistic vision.

Artistic Inspiration

Print media, including magazines, newspapers, and advertisements, serve as a rich source of inspiration for my work. The concept of ready-mades fascinates me, sparking creative ideas and driving my artistic endeavors. Additionally, the internet is an invaluable resource, offering endless possibilities for exploration and inspiration.

Personal Reflections

Creating art is not just a profession for me; it's a grounding and essential outlet that helps me navigate the complexities of our world. I find joy in both the artistic process and the final outcomes of my creations. Striking a balance between knowing when to conclude a piece and the risk of overworking it is a challenge I embrace as a fundamental aspect of my artistic growth.

Conclusion

As I continue to evolve along this artistic path, I am excited about the future and the projects that lie ahead. Stay connected for updates on upcoming exhibitions and new works. Your support and interest fuel my creative journey.

 

 

 

 

Journey thru thick time

 

Journey thru thick time (1967-72) Pengkalan Chepa, Kelantan

Jalak, Dino, Ning, John, Johny, Mimi, Donny and Marie were some of the names of our cats. we had more than 10 cats around that time and sometimes more. they were mostly stray cats and orange in color.

Donny and Marie got their names from the american singers /entertainers Donny and Marie Osmond who had a weekly show on tv. ‘i m a little bit country, i am a little bit rock and roll ‘ was one of their popular songs.

Jalak was a wild jungle cat who one day got lost and came to our house. to tame Jalak my mum spit her saliva into the rice and fed him. yes, it worked. we also had a burmese cat. burmese cats sometimes have long beautiful furs and were quite expensive if u were to buy them.

the cats were normally fed with rice and fish. my mum would buy fresh fish and boil them in hot water. she then crushed the fish and mixed together with rice. it was a much cheaper way to feed them than buying cat food. the smell of the boil fish was a bit stinky but all the cats love them. sometimes the cats got unlucky to have bones stuck in their mouths. but they always managed to get them out themselves.

all the cats have different characters but they love u most when it is feeding time.

some of the cats got pregnant and start to breed. we would have small kittens and they were the most adorable. we had to watch out for the male cats cause some were jealous of the male kittens and would try to kill them. some got away with it a couple of times.

i used to have my face scratched by cats all the time. it didnt bother me so much cause i love to play with them. sometimes some of them fell into the stinking drain and we had to wash them. and u all know how cats are with water.

 

 

 

my brother and i went to sultan ismail primary school in kota bharu. both my sisters went to sekolah Zainab. we took the school bus and it was about 8 km meters from home. 8km was quite a long journey in those days. the roads were long and winding. we had to past thru the center and get over to the other side of the city to get there.

my first bus was the type that has a shape of a nose infront where the engine is stored. it was old and always breaks down. i did get a few rides before it went totally kaput. when my brother joined me to school later, we then had another bus which was in better condition. but it didnt help us coming to school on time . the driver will drive and send the other school kids to other schools first. we were his last destination. so we always arrived late to school and got punished for it even though it was not our fault. there was no mercy from the teachers. no questions were asked and we will get a few lashes of rotan on our buttocks. during those days the teachers were allowed to give u a rotan or gave you a slap on your face if were caught for doing something wrong. fear was used in full force and this didnt help to free the children. it created a gap…an authoritarian one which is the worse. the children become passive and not train to ask questions when in doubt. some teachers get a kick out of doing that. those should be sent for rehab. thank god they stopped doing that now. not all teachers were like that though. some were like angels and u feel u want to bring them home.

Arriving late to school went on quite frequently that we had to think of something to avoid those painful punishments. my brother came up with a trick where he put a book in between his pants and his butt which worked rather well. the teacher must have been quite stupid not to notice that or maybe they just closed one eye and ‘make dunno’. maybe some of them do felt the pain when they give us those lashes. perhaps those days they were instructed to do it. i dunno.

i tried sneaking up thru the back door to enter the classroom and went in when the teacher was writing on the blackboard. it didnt always work. sometimes i would wait for the first lesson to be over before coming in. i would hanged out in the back of the school or stay in the toilet to wait. when the school bell rings, then u just act as if u came from the toilet. make sure u hide your school bags though. u have to find ways to survive.

 

 

 

journey thru thick time(1968-72) pengkalan chepa, kelantan

there is pokok semambu- neem tree- infront of our house. the tree is still there when i looked thru google earth. pretty amazing.

the leaves are known to cure many diseases among them for chicken pox. u boil the leaves and take a bath with the water. u can also use various parts of the tree due to its antibacterial, anti-fungal, anti-allergic and anti-inflammatory properties. lots of people and strangers came to our house and asked permissions to take the leaves. it is a huge tree and be able to feed the whole army. the tree is also one of my favourite to climb on. it has big and steady trunks and it is also cooling to be under it on a hot day.

we also had aloe vera plant which have great healing properties. good for skins, hair and weight loss. we like to put eggs shells at the point of the leaves. i guess it is something people do for decoration.

but eggshells are made almost entirely of calcium carbonate, which is good for plants. you can deliver it to them through compost, soil or by making “eggshell tea.”

we also had ubi gajah- elephant tapioca. they were huge and we have to dig really deep to get them out. u can eat tapioca by boiling them and dip with sambal or sugar. it has to be served while it is still warm. otherwise they ll be hard. my mum told me that they used to live eating tapioca during the japanese occupation in WW2. tapioca are quite easy to plant. just cut the trunks about one feet long and stick it in the earth. shower them with water and u ll see them grow.

 

 

 

journey thru thick time (1967-1972) from muar to pengkalan chepa

we had our first tv probably around 1970/1. it was a ‘national’ brand. we were very lucky to be able to afford it. i think my mum were very good at savings with her little salary and it helped when we didnt have to pay for the house rent and telephone bills. it was pure luxury in those days to have such things. everything was still in black and white and only in 1978 that RTM malaysia started to introduce color broadcasting. we did try putting a color screen infront of the tv so it will be artificially colored…but itnever look good.

we were one of the few to have a tv in the area. so everyday we have a house full of neighbouring kids sitting in front of the tv all day long.

we would watch ultraman, disneyshow, wrestling, football, scoobydoo, bonanza etc. my all time favourite was ‘the lone ranger’ and his red indian friend kimosabi. probably it has to do something with the mask and them being an outlaw.

p ramlee movies were everyones favorites and all those ghost stories like pontianak and so on. nobody dared to sleep alone after watching such movies. thank god we didnt have any malay tv drama at that time.

in one of the pictures is my sister Oie celebrating her birthday infront of our tv 

 

journey thru thick time (1967-1972) from muar to pengkalan chepa

 

pantai sabak is about 4.5 km away from where we lived. so sometimes we brought our picnic basket there to swim in the sea. we will normally bring meehun goreng and sardine sandwich. there is something about salt water that make sardine

sandwich taste especially delicious.

on the beach there were people selling drinks and snacks. u can also find people selling belangkas bakar, grill horseshoe crabs. the smell of it makes your saliva drools in many different ways.

sometimes u have to be very careful when swimming coz there were lots of ampai ampai or jellyfish. they say vinegar is the best cure for it.

there were lots of old british bunkers in the area which were used to fight off the japanese during the WW2. pantai sabak was the first landing place attacked by the japs in malaya which took place on dec 8 1941. two hours after the attacked at pantai sabak, they bombed pearl harbour. they managed to conquer the place very quickly with the help from their airforce. they easily chased the british out and invaded the whole malaya a few months after.

there was a propaganda film done by the japanese during the war which is called ‘ the tiger of malaya’. the film was inspired by a real life story about a japanese man who grew up in terengganu and whose father had a barber shop. he was later recruited to be a spy for the japanese military.

 

 

 

 

 

journey thru thick time (1967-1972) from muar to pengkalan chepa

our first telephone number was 2255. Our auntie Mak Nah who lives in KL loved the number so much that she had it on her car number plate on her peugoet.

our next door neighbour was a sweet japanese man. sometimes he would find some earth worms and took my brother for fishing.

cakap pasal cacing, masa kecik banyak masalah cacing dalam perut. mungkin sebab kalau main dekat luar tu tak pakai kasut, kaki ayam aje. cacing tu ada yg kecik2 tapi ada juga yang panjang2. bila buang air besar kadang2 kena tarik dia keluar. so kena makan ubat macam dlm gambar tu.

Infront of our house, there is a school called SMK Pengkalan Chepa. There was one time where our mother or Mak we prefer to call her will make ice creams and we helped to sell them to the school kids. These ice creams or popsicles were made from sweet drinks like orange, vanilla, chocolate flavor etc. and came in different colors. They each cost 5 cents and on a hot sunny day, they sold out pretty fast. My favourite was ‘the one with asam merah’.

 

 

 

this is one of the earliest photo of us taken in 1972 at a photo studio in Kota Bharu.

from left my younger brother Ateh, our beloved emak Azizah(al-fatihah), my big sister Ati, me and my little sister Oie.

we were lucky to have Ateh in the picture cause everytime we want to take picture with him, he will be hiding behind a tree.

 

 

 

journey thru thick time - 1967-1972- from muar to pengkalan chepa.

we, my mother, two sisters and my younger brother used to live in this govt. house (on the right in this picture) which looks like it is being abandoned now. i am quite surprised that it is still standing there though.

my mother was transferred to work in telecoms malaysia from muar to kota bharu. so we had the luxury of a telephone in the house. the house has 3 rooms and two toilets. i got locked in one of them a couple of times when i didnt behave.